I don’t believe that the mother of all fear is anything specific like death or disease. I think the real mother of all fears is the unknown. I’ve been examining my relationship with it lately, and wow. What a treat.
If you’ve ever heard of the status quo bias, you probably know this already…but it’s worth repeating. More people will pick to keep things exactly the way they are, even if they’re suffering, than risk experiencing something that they don’t know, something that they can’t predict.
You might favor familiarity, but is it of favor to you? Is it growing you, changing you and evolving you? Or is it making you stuck, totally miserable and sick of yourself (or just…sick).
You probably know the answer to that already, but you stop yourself from making change because what if. What if it doesn’t work out?
What if it all goes south?
What if you hate it?
What if all your deep fears come true?
In every possible option out there in life, you can’t help but think of five exact worse ways it would go wrong.
You see the absurdity in that right?
What would happen if you chose to see something else…something bright, and loving, and exciting, and possible? What if the only thing that clouded your mind when you thought of making a change were the brilliant possibilities that could happen once you act?
Possibilities like true love. Adventure. New experiences. More money. Different skills. Happier outlooks. Dreams come true.
What about those possibilities? Where have you been ignoring the beautiful in your obsession with the bleak?
I don’t know about you, but focusing on possibilities makes my day WAY better. Not to mention my chest feels a little bit more open. I smile more. I’m less of an asshole. My cynicism dies down. I’m a pleasure to be around. That’s what’s possible when you believe anything positive is possible, which it is.
I wrote to you about the big unknown that I stepped into a few weeks ago. Once it became real, I sorta freaked out. My nervous system flashed every warning sign that there could be danger here. Everything I’ve never wanted could come true, and I could have chosen my way to misery. Ugh.
But then I heard this quote, “The unknown has never let me down.” And I gave a little cry which was part laugh, laughter at the absurdity of how haywire my brain had gone trying to predict and protect from all the missteps that might come true. Because when I look back on my life, the things that worked out in all the absolute best ways were the same ones when I jumped willingly (and dramatically) into the unknown. They were uncomfortable at first, sure. And…they gave way to energy that created beautiful, life-altering opportunities.
I don’t know about you, but I’m seeking a lifetime of more of that. Not more of the same comforts that keep me small.
The unknown won’t let you down. Make sure you don’t either.